Stuff I find funny and you should too, or you can go fuck yourself
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moeranda:

itseliberg33:

can she just get an award or something

I reblog this whenever it pops up on my dash.

A word of advice to trans women

orangelemonart:

interruptmag:

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Go to your nearest target. Buy a two pack of pushup bras (24$ for 2), and target’s bra inserts (12$). Then go to your nearest Walmart and buy the Vasserette Control Shapewear Panties (2.50 each), they do wonders for helping your tuck. There you go! You just saved yourself a lot of money, you can afford to buy enough to wear every day, and best of all you look fabulous. -@twidx

recs for trans women are so rare on tumblr!! spread this, people.

getoffmybloghoe:

keep your drugs safe by putting them in a gyro bowl 

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The Selfie (x)

slenclerman:

steampoweredgrapefruit:

slenclerman:

its illegal to be cuter than me

We’re all going to jail then

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gh0stpixie:

Cosmo Tip 5437:
Secretly use super glue instead of lube so you can be together forever

dutchster:

i have such a busy schedule. i may have to cut out “studying” to make room for “crying over tv shows” and “4 hour nap”

justalilblondemama:

Accidental personal injuries are absolutely the worst. “Oh, how did you do that?” “Well, frankly, I’m an idiot.”

zackisontumblr:

*taps foot impatiently while waiting for someone to date me*

toinfinityandbeyonce:

MY ANACONDA DONT

grimbarkjadeappreciationblog:

videohall:

For some reason a bird speaking Japanese is mildly off putting.

> Literal translation

Bird:” ‘Uhm Hello, this is the Ono family.”

Bird: “What’s wrong?”

Owner: “Abe-chan, you’re a little too early. Once the phone’s picked up, then properly say hello.”

Bird: “Okay, understood.”

Owner: “Do you really understand? I’m counting on you. Hello, this is the Ono family residence in Gifu.”]

Bird: “Okay, I understand!”

Owner: “Got it.”

> That’s clearly some sort of Pokemon.

> Off-putting? It’s like birds were meant to speak Japanese!

> For some reason it’s never occurred to me that birds can mimic languages other than English. It’s so cool, though!

annicron:

look at this thing i got at the airport when leaving germany

it’s a giant tic tac box filled with tiny tic tac boxes

reblog